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So I have an 8month old kitten. We’ve had him since he was about 8weeks. He is very hyper and we now are having to watch a friend’s older, female cat. The two do not get along and we live in a studio apartment. Our kitten has started being really aggressive and hateful to us, I assume because he is jealous. We don’t get know what to do and it is stressful for everyone that lives there!
Help!?
Separate them. I take it you didn’t introduce them and eased them into this?
Set up a small room, with water and food on one side, a litter tray on the other, a scratching post and somewhere to lie. Give the room to the older cat, as she is the new one to the territory.
Cats are territorial and need time to make friends, unlike dogs.
Let her recover there for a day or two, and visit her often, with some toys and cuddles. Meanwhile, use a fishing rod to play with your 8month old, so he can vent the stress he has been feeling about the intruder in his home.
Has he been neutered yet? Coz I’d say you wanna get that done soon, as he might start spraying soon – and this incident certainly gives him a good reason to.
First things firs though – reintroduce them to each other. Depending on how long they’ve been at each other, this will be harder and take longer.
Once the older cat is comfortable (tail up to greet you, eats properly ,uses litter tray, lies down and purrs instead of hiding – this may take a day or so), start her on liking the other cat. Here’s how:
Take two small towels. Rub one towel along the sides, chin and cheeks of the 8 month old. Do the same with the other towel with the older cat. Now, put the towel underneath the food bowl of the other cat, so they’ll associate the smell of the other cat with something good – aka, their food.
Once there is no visible reaction to this (hissing, not eating, getting upset, whatever), step it up. Push their food bowls to either side of the door, so they can eat in each others presence, without being able to attack each other. That, or use treats that they only get when in that spot – again, to create good vibrations. Meanwhile, keep up the playtime as well!
Next up, do a swap: crate your 8month old, or lock him in another room and let the older cat out – open the door. Let her decide how fast she wants to leave her little safe haven and leave the door open at all times. If she rushes back inside, that’s fine, but after a while she should feel comfortable enough to explore the entire flat without the threat of the 8 month old. Once she is confident and doesn’t need to retreat to her special place, take your 8month old and let him explore her safe haven (close the door at this point, but stay with him so he can indicate he has had enough). Encourage liking the smell of the strange cat in their territories by feeding them treats. Return them both to their territories.
Next, feed them again by the door (just make sure the bowls aren’t next to each other once you hopen the door), and slightly open the door, no more than a smidge. Close it again after 30 seconds. Slowly build up the time frame, and make sure you close the door before there is a chance of an escalation (posturing, meowing, and eventually hissing an whacking). Give them time in-between to recover- at least 10 minutes, preferably 30 to an hour – to let any animosity subside before you try again. If there is no indication of any animosity, but curious sniffing instead, go ahead and open the door further. Again, as long s they’re both comfortable, you can take it to the next step and leave the door open – under supervision!
Once this goes well, leave the door open. Let them both get used to each other in their territories and set new routines (cats timeshare and need time to figure out who gets which spot when), but return the female to her safe haven at night, for at least another day or so. Once you’ve observed that there is happiness, purring, tails up, and no hissing, you can risk them staying together at night.
Throughout all of this two things are important:
* playtime, especially for the kitten to release stress
* At ANY TIME, go at their pace. If you find that there is escalating, go back to the previous step and start again as you moved too fast.
Good luck!
In a pinch, you can get a big crate from a vet or a shelter or a pet shop, to act as the ‘small room’, since you live in a studio apartment. If you can use the bathroom, feel free to, but be sure that the older cat isn’t terrified when the washer or dryer goes as that isn’t going to be conducive to the process.
A word of caution: the longer you let this go on, the bigger the animosity will be, the harder it will be to get them to get along and the more chance you’ll have of one of them spraying, or stress-peeing in the house – not to mention they will be at greater risk for urinary tract infections.
Helpful tools to support the treatment are the feliway vaporiser which puts calming feline pheromones in the air, treats, fishing rod toys and potentially a bathrobe if the elder cat hisses at you coz your clothes smell of the 8month old kitten, to wear when you go into her room.
Due to the age gap, I’d also advise to make sure that the 8 month old gets his daily 10 minutes of play time – even after they’ve been re-introduced successfully – so he doesn’t take his boredom out on the elder cat.
Have you tried animal communication? It helps to get down to the real reason the kitten is frustrated. It may be something you never even thought of.
I plan to try this all out. They are already starting to get more use to each other. I just really do need to focus on going at their pace. Thanks for the tips guys!
Np, let us know how it goes 🙂
Well helpful stuff I found here.
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